Monthly Archives: May 2012

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A week ago I wrote this.

I was feeling optimistic and hopeful, but I’m still waiting on some blanks to be filled in. Questions that weigh heavily on me, and will possibly change the outcome. I’m still not certain as to which way I want to go, fully knowing it’s not up to me anyway.

In cases like this, where I have no control, it’s easy for me to feel defeated and discouraged. I could very easily sit and have worrisome thoughts all day long, pondering the what ifs. I can choose to listen to the lies of satan, or listen to God’s promises. Psalm 91:4 He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.

When I feel myself slipping, and it’s a very slippery slope, all I can do is pray.

I don’t want to carry worry, it’s not my cross to bear.

I don’t want to carry defeat. Jesus gave me victory when He withstood a horrific beating and was hung on the cross.  I wait quietly before God, for my victory comes from him. Psalm 62:1

When I start to worry or have the desire to control the situation, I just turn to Him and repent. Jesus, I’m so sorry I keep picking up worry and trying to control situations and outcomes. I know that You have a plan, and You are in control. Honestly, I don’t want that pressure, and I’m thankful that You are willing to walk me through all this. Please forgive me, Lord, and guide me in Your ways. Take my thoughts captive and fill me with Your love and joy. Amen

Last night I simply gave the situation over to Him. I asked Him to take it from my hands and mind, and help me to trust in His ways.

Truthfully, I don’t have control over much of anything in this life. When I think about the presidential election coming up, it would be easy to be disheartened that I don’t want either one of the two running our country. The current state of the world is extremely frightening if I choose to dwell on it. I don’t want to be politically correct. I want to be biblically correct.

I choose to trust in Jesus daily, most days multiple times a day.  I see the bad and give it up.

It’s a choice. If I carried the bad with me, my heart would change for the bad.

How do you handle worry and stress?

I’m linking up again for Just Write.

A spirit of fear

Life happens, and that’s a good thing. We should be thankful for that because it’s not a guarantee that we will wake up in the morning.

Life often times gets messy, and that makes it harder to be thankful. But that is when we should be the most thankful.

It’s hard to learn, but I’m getting there. Looking at my surroundings and being thankful, even in the mess and trials.

I’m not really a worry filled person, but I do struggle with fear, and I’m confessing that to you now for a reason. Fear does NOT come from the Lord. He did not equip me with a spirit of fear, in fact He equipped me to be a warrior for Him. His word tells me over 365 times not to fear! I’m not a mathematician, but that’s once for every day of the year. So really, I shouldn’t fear.

I’ve been praying about something for a while now, and nothing has happened with that prayer. I was ok with that, because sometimes God says it’s just not the right time. Sometimes He says wait. My favorite is when He tells me to Be Still and wait.

Yeah, I’m a control freak, and He’s working on that with me.

Anyway, the other day I was talking to my daughter about this prayer, and telling her I wasn’t sure what to be praying for, so I just placed it totally in His hands. Then I asked Him for a sign.

A couple of hours later I received an email, and that was my sign. Seriously, He gave me a sign, and it was a direct answer to the prayer.

Was I happy? Or filled with fear of the what ifs?

Fear

I carried it with me for three days before I thought to myself, “give it up!” So I did, and today I’ve felt ok about it. I’ve had a long talk with my very supportive and encouraging husband, and I feel good about what may come.

There’s still so many unknowns involved, and questions to be answered, but I am not going to walk in fear any more.

What makes you walk in fear?

2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

Isaiah 11:2 And the Spirit of the LORD will rest on him—
the Spirit of wisdom and understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and might,
the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the LORD.

I’m linking up today with several wonderful writers over at The Extraordinary Ordinary- Just Write

My Inner Woman, My Creative Heart

I ran across a notebook from Blissdom as I was cleaning the bedroom, and wanted to share what I wrote in one of the breakout sessions. The session was Fierce living from your Creative Heart. This was a tear filled session that really made me think. Here’s what I wrote.

What does my creative heart need and want in 2012?

My creative heart seeks peace, and to be fully present in each moment. I need love and acceptance from those around me and to be around others like me, who GET me. I feel like my heart is telling me to share my story. The ugly and the unique. I want the courage to do that, and I really want to build a community that we can help each other. Encourage!

My inner woman who lives inside of my creative heart wants me to know it will be ok. Trust in the plans He has for me and lean on Him to lead me through the journey. Trials will strengthen and refine me. I will come out a changed woman. A woman with a story to share. A woman who is better in ways I never imagined. A woman who is stronger than I ever knew possible. A woman who knows love and is overflowing with gratitude for the journey that sparked the change.

Six word memoirs

Having courage to tell my story.
Full of hope and yet afraid.
Can I do this? Will I?
Faithful yet timid. Desiring all strength.
Embracing life, choosing joy and love.

What is your inner self saying? Share with me?